Now that it's been a month since the release of Undone, I thought I would write up something talking about my initial ideas for the game and how those changed over time, as well as what I've learned and what I wish I'd done differently. This will, of course, include spoilers for Undone, so I would recommend playing the game first before reading this.

I started writing Undone while I was in university, in 2012 or so. (I have a terrible inability to remember how long ago things were in a specific way. I could do the math, but I don't want to.) I had been dating my boyfriend, Mark, for less than a year (I think? Again, I don't do time), and one of the things we bonded over were the games Nine Hours Nine Persons Nine Doors and Virtue's Last Reward. These are visual novels with puzzle elements that play with the idea of multiple routes in VNs by requiring you to carry over information from some routes to complete others, including the 'true' route. All routes are canon, explained to be multiple timelines. I loved the way these games used the medium to enhance their stories, unlike most games I was playing where the gameplay and story were mostly separate. 

Enter Twine. When I discovered Twine, it was the first time game writing became a real possibility for me. I had always kind of wanted to write games, but it was a very abstract desire I had no idea how to go about doing. This and talking about 999 and VLR with my boyfriend led my to my decision: I would dip my toes into Twine, and game writing, by writing a small game inspired by those games as a Christmas gift for my boyfriend. It would have two routes, one revolving around space travel and the other around time travel, would probably be a little schlocky, and would have a cute boy to romance in each route. 

I started writing with very little planning, adding to each route as things came to me. Soon I was focusing mostly on the 'space' route, as ideas had solidified a little more quickly for that one. I was writing between classes and homework and seeing my friends and boyfriend. Christmas was fast approaching, and I realized I needed to pick up the pace in order to finish in time. A good chunk of the route was written in those months, and remains largely intact in the final version, but at a certain point I knew it wasn't gonna happen, and so I turned my focus elsewhere, intending to finish the game at a later date.

At the time, I had a real problem with finishing projects in general. I had a handful of things I was rotating between while also adding new things every once in a while, and only occasionally deciding to actually scrap something. So, over the next few years I would put in little bits of work here and there. My idea of the game wasn't as strong anymore, though, so I found it difficult to make real progress and would put Undone on the back burner again. Meanwhile, I grew as a writer of conventional fiction, getting a few short stories published and building a support network of writers who could encourage each other to do their best. This included, for a short while, a game writers' group. Talking about game writing with them got me thinking about Undone again, and after reacquainting myself with Twine and writing Time Passed, I was ready to really begin work on Undone again.

One of the specific turning points for me was discovering the various interactive fiction competitions. I entered Time Passed in IFComp and resolved to enter Undone into IntroComp, a competition for unfinished games. I wrote like crazy to finish the space route for the deadline, and when I finished early, I added another sizable branch to the route. It was only when I got to the end that I realized how the game fit together, not as two separate routes you could play independently, but as a time loop. 

For a brief period I described the game as one where you had to repeat a time loop and learn new information from different branches in order to end the loop, kind of like VLR. That idea didn't last long, as I realized it would be much more work than what I ended up doing. As a result, I'm a little dissatisfied with the way the time loop gimmick is underutilized. I wouldn't mind writing a game like that someday. 

IntroComp does a thing where, if you finish your entry within a year from the end of the competition, you get a cash prize depending on your placement in the competition. Undone was an honorary mention, so I was competing to be the first honorary mention to complete my game by the early September deadline. Unfortunately, someone else was quicker. This meant I wasn't beholden to any deadline officially, but I decided to release the game by the end of September 2019 at the latest anyways. As mentioned, I have historically had trouble finishing projects. One factor is the drive to make what I'm working on perfect before release. What I've learned, though, is that no project is ever going to be perfect. I could keep revising forever and ever if I let myself. Eventually, you just have to let go.

There are lots of things I wish I could change about Undone. I don't like how carelessly violence is used. I don't like how there's a noticeable gap in writing quality between the stuff I wrote early on and the stuff I wrote more recently, since I've improved so much as a writer in that time. I don't like how easy it is to miss the parts of the game that make certain characters likable or relatable. I was careful not to make the game seem anti-alien (the description cites a "mysterious" rather than "alien" threat, for example), but that could probably still be read into the game, and I don't like that I didn't consider that carefully enough. 

Undone is, frankly, not my best work, but it is my biggest finished work, and I have to be proud of that. I also have to be forgiving of those places where the game falls short, and recognize that it is much, much easier to make a small game seem polished that it is for a game of this size. 

One other thing that changed about the game over time is that I gained a clearer sense of what it is about, at its very core. When I started, it was just a fun, silly, sci-fi thing. Since the day I began it, though, I've changed a lot. I've become more politically aware, with more solid ideas of what I want the world to be. With that came a certain level of frustration that I couldn't do much to change things, that I can live my life the best way I know how and still make no greater impact. Undone became a game about choice, about how we are fooled into believing we have influence while powers greater than us restrict what real change we can make. It can be read as a meta-commentary on choice in games, but it's really about choice in real life, and I hope that it's resonated with you, at least a little. 

Undone has not sold well up front, but the fact that it has sold at all, that anyone has played it, is a blessing to me. If you have played it, thank you. If you have not, or you would like a friend to play it, please know that I have started a Patreon, and all patrons receive access to a link to 50% off Undone. I will continue to add exclusive writing to Patreon to make becoming a patron worth it, and any future paid projects will be made available at lower prices, or for free, for patrons as well.

PS. It's super annoying how Amazon put out a thing about time loops called Undone just before I did.